That "are you kidding me" moment

[shankspony]

One more...

So when I shoot a deer my hunting partner who happens to be my best friend guts it. When he shoots one, I gut it out. It was a fall hunt with crunchy leaves and cold evenings. Getting within an hour or two of dark my phone vibrates and I see a text saying he had one on the ground.

I decided I would go then instead of waiting and arrived to see a nice little buck on the ground. I high five him and start the process. But wait... Im wearing my brand new 1000.00 King of the Mountain wool and don't want to get blood on it. He is walking to his stand to get his gear and I decide to strip down to my tighty whities and LaCrosse rubber boots. Weird I know but I didn't want blood on them.

I drag the deer so the head is uphill and flat on his back with all fours in the air. I hear my buddy come back but Im already up to my elbows inside the cavity trying to cut. So here I am with my legs holding the deers back legs and blood up to my elbows trying to cut.

All the sudden my buddy who is standing by the deers head reaches over and grabs the elastic of my tighties and yanks them prit near up to my ears. Well this action splits the twins and gives me a thong that Victoria Secret would be jealous of.

 I whip the knife out and try to stick him but he is running away with my King of the Mountain... so here I am with bloody hands and arms, my underwear where it shouldn't be and limited options! I was hoping there were no other hunters in the area.

He was laughing so hard I thought he was going to have heart failure! At first I was ticked but quickly started laughing myself. It came to a happy ending with him dragging his own deer with NO help from me!

 

The opening day of duckshooting is a big day over here, and I have about 5 guys come hunt with me. It was below zero that morning so I stuck on a new cammo balaclava. As the day warmed I rolled it up into a hat.
I was having an appalling day, really frustrating, the ducks kept flaring away from me, and I could not find what was causing it. Nothing I could see on the hide or around it. The other guys said everything looked fine.
I get home that night and head up to the bathroom and find out that my new balaclava was white on the inside. When I rolled it up I was wearing a big white hat. Thanks guys, hope you enjoyed yourselves.

[twitchstick]

Last night I decided to hunt elk in a spot I had not hunted this season. It is a canyon that gets over looked and the elk like to go there when they have been pushed. As I was putting on my pack I thought that I could hear some cow chirps but wasn't sure. I started up into the head of this canyon when I could hear the elk. I could tell that they were in the first small meadow. I had barley left the truck and I had elk close and were headed my direction. I know this spot well and they were only 80ish yards away when a bull sounded a low gutterly grunt. I was getting ready for them to fall into my lap when my horn on my truck started going off!!!!! Some how I bumped the panic button on my keys! They went quite and never seen them or heard them agian

[Pine]

Around the late 1970s I was bow hunting with my brother-in-law and his dad.
Around 11:00 am we met back at the van and the dad told this story.
He was standing next to a large tree trunk (that's the way he hunts not liking to sit with a bow) and a very large number of deer start walking past him just a few yards away.
He has his bow leaning on the tree beside him and he is slowly moving his hand to grab it.
All the time looking at the passing deer for any sign they might see him.
He cant feel the bow so he turns his head to look.
Busted! A doe had walked up behind him and was only about 2 feet from him. 

[J. Cook]

Really big buck responded to a grunt call last year on Nov. 9th... He proceeds to stomp, pee, and scrape his way to me in my shooting lane at exactly 17 yards.  I was already imagining how I'd get him mounted...  I hit him high and forward in the shoulder, got about 2" of penetration.  Got pictures of him all the way through 2/17/2020 when he shed his antlers.  Glad he was unharmed... But that was definately my biggest "you gotta be kidding me moments."

What a goof-up on my end!

[Trenton G.]

Early November a few years ago I went out for a morning hunt. The rut was going pretty good and I'd seen bucks out chasing does the past two times I had been out. The night before we had gotten one of those wet, heavy snows that clings to everything and makes all the branches hang down low. When I climbed into my stand, everything around me was white. All the limbs were coated and hanging down, unfortunately blocking the majority of my shooting lanes. Of course, right around 9:00 I hear grunting and buck comes cruising through and takes the trail 15 yards away. All I can see are bits and pieces. Never got a clear look at him thanks to the snow.

[PASQUINELL]

Twitchstick I did that same thing Whitetail hunting. I was hunting a hedge row with a bunch of scrapes and rubs along a corn field and had my truck parked fairly close. Had no idea they had that range with panic button! I was feeling my pockets to make sure I had my pocket knife and found my keys instead.

[Kopper1013]

I was 16 and it was my first year with a smoke pole. I killed a really nice buck first thing (lucky me) and was just hanging for the rest of the morning. About 9am the belly gurgling started it wasn’t long before nature was calling. I had never sh*t in the woods but that morning pops sent me with a roll of TP and said “just in case” well just in case had come knocking.
I climbed down and found a tree to lean against, pulled down my coveralls, leaned against the tree and began. I was pretty proud until I looked down while wiping and realized I didn’t make sure my coveralls where out of the way  yup I filled them.
What’s a boy to do? I spent the next 10 min trying to clean them with the whole roll of paper my pops had sent me with. Lunch time we headed for the trucks (I figured I’d keep all this to myself) when my uncle showed up he asked “who the hell used that much paper? It looks like it snowed by the north trail” it was then that I realized the tree I choose was almost right on the trail in and I wasn’t going to be able to hide my mistakes
Now every year it has to be brought up on opening weekend

[Mamba]

I was 12 or 13 and my dad set me up on a hillside sitting on the ground in fresh snow.  He planned to still hunt and make a big loop trying to push something my way.  Well I saw nothing.  He walked up a few hours later asking what happened did I see the buck? I hadn't I said, there was no buck.  Then he looked around for tracks and there was a single set just a few feet behind me that made an abrupt uturn and bounded away.  I Must have fallen asleep.

[Kittatinny]

Many years ago, I had exclusive rights to hunt my buddie's wholesale nursery farm.  A week prior to opening day, I attended a deer hunting seminar at the local fire house. The brochures advertised some really nice door prizes, so I asked a friend from work and my nephew to go along.  The fire hall was set up with lots of chairs and I was a bit surprised to see, that we were the only ones there.  After a bit, the speaker came out and started the seminar.

The speech was all about grunting and rattling, something none of us had ever tried. The speaker overlooked the fact that there were only three people there, and gave a very insightful seminar.  At the end the drawings for door prizes were held. I was glad to see my buddy win the Hoyt compound, I won a dozen XX75"s and my nephew won six broad heads. I ended up buying a grunt call and feeling silly about it.

Opening day found me walking to my tree stand located along a hedgerow on the nursery.  I was wearing rubber boots, scent pads, and gloves to help cover my scent.  It was about an hour before sunrise when I climbed into my stand. I'd scouted heavily during late summer and located a few nice bucks. I was thinking about those bucks when by 10:00, I hadn't seen anything resembling a deer. I allowed myself to feel a bit frustrated and sat down in my stand. This would prove to be huge mistake.

My mind was drifting from the intense focus I had earlier.  I remembered the deer hunting seminar I'd attended and chuckled to myself, thinking grunting would never work. I then realized that I had brought the grunt call along, just for grins of course.  Sheepishly, I grunted several times and then again several minutes later.  I then caught movement off to my right.  A smokey colored 8 point had busted through a thicket and into the filed I'd walked across hours earlier.  He hit the scent trail I'd laid out and followed it nose down. I was in the process of gathering my bow when he stopped right under my stand. My stand creaked and the buck took off down the hedgerow never to be seen again.

This was a time when rattling and grunting was all but unheard of in my area. I never expected it to work, especially that well. I've tried grunting and rattling since then, but never had it work like that first time.

[PASQUINELL]

Aint that how it always happens!

Here is another for me.

I hunt some land in an area that you would be very lucky to see a three year old buck. Gets hunted pretty hard. It was a fall day with heavy winds and leaves falling. Noisy would be an understatement and the ladder stand was a swaying back and forth with the tree.

Well forget hearing anything and going to have to rely on vision. Looking left I see this buck walk into view but way too far for me to shoot. So I pick up the binos for a look and wowser that is a nice buck.

I look at the head and it looks like he has a toupee of reddish hair between the antlers so I name him 'wiggy buck' and its on..

He never came my way and the next day I saw him again in that same location.  So I decided to go look down there for scrape line, trail, rubs something. Nothing, I found nothing. I mean where I have my stand now there is sign but no deer... Do I use a climber and set up down there??? What do I do??
Three days I saw him there. I set a stand there and sit. Nothing. Dang it!!! I sit there for two days and now Im thinking Im stinking the place up so give it a few days away dreaming of Wiggy!

Im heading down there in the morning... I decide to hunt my original location and wouldn't you know its noisy woods day again! I can't hear a thing unless it was in front of me. Im in the stand but my body is twisted a bit along with my head because I just know he is going to show up down on other end. There I sit staring to my left, my recurve on my lap for an eternity. I decide to hook my bow on a hook for awhile. As I am slowly moving my left arm with the bow to the hook on my left, I hear a snap... There standing about 15 yards in front of me was Wiggy and he was looking right at me... busted! Never heard him come in and never saw him again.

[old_goat2]

Hunted all season with deer in range but no shot opportunities, last day to hunt and I made a late move, bow on ground trying to screw bow holder into the frozen tree and I look over my shoulder to see a doe broadside watching me