'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, the kids had moved out;
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that Big Jim soon would be there;
Now FeeFee the Rottweiler all snug in his bed,
While visions of the neighbors cat danced in his head;
And mamma in her flannel, and I in my, well, I won’t go there,
Had just settled our brains for a long winter’s nap,
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the bed to go empty my bladder.
Away to the window I flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters and they are destroyed.
The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Gave the lustre of Thunderbird on a brand new longbow.,
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a miniature sleigh, and eight tinny reindeer,
With a great big old driver, who’s never been slim,
I knew in a moment it must be Big Jim.
More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;
‘Now Gold tip! now, True flite! now, Zwickey and Vixen!
On, Nugent! On, Kmag! on, on Bohning and Blitzen!
To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall!
Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!’