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Author Topic: Terry Green's "Little Woodie" & Too Short  (Read 2292 times)

Offline [email protected]

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Terry Green's "Little Woodie" & Too Short
« on: October 21, 2007, 04:52:00 PM »


Hi Tradgangers…it’s me, “Little Woodie”.  You might think it a bit strange, me a lowly broadhead writing this tale, but realize I AM the end of the arrow that counts!  Every thing else is just the delivery system.

And I have traveled a bit in search of finding meaning to my life, New Zealand, many of the Western States to my final resting place on a cold and windy hillside in Colorado.

And before you look down at your shaft at me, you bow hunters aren’t such hot stuff.  I have been around enough to see you at your very worse, lying through your teeth at any campfire where there is more than one of you. And if Too Short is any example you perform despicable mating habits with the “innocents”.  But, perhaps that comes from being on a Montana ranch for far too long listening to the wind telling him he is in love.  But we will get to that bit of perversion in its own good time.

Like all good stories, it’s best to start at the beginning… I can remember through the mist of time two really funny guys laughing and claiming they had whupped anorexia at her own game.  Sure looked like it to me, I can tell you for certain that the old girl just never stood a chance.

Next thing I knew Terry Green was taking me out of the package and massaging me all over.  Before too long my edges became razor sharp, then through a secret method known only to Terry, and shared with Bob, my edges became so sharp they would cut your eyeballs by just looking at me.  

Then Terry painted all these little lines all over me; for why, I know not.  He got pretty excited (well all you guys know that!) and he shipped me off to Bob’s house in Oregon so he could look me over.  I felt so dirty with him ogling my every crack, crevice and edge…the shame of it.

(Now, remember these were in the days before Trad Gang was even a thought in Terry’s mind and Bob and Terry were exchanging “trade secrets” in sharpening good three blade heads).

Bob then sent one of his WW to Terry for his inspection and I have often wondered what happened to my cousin?

Then, I did some thing really bad and Bob tossed me in a box with a bunch of other broad heads… some had been hunting and had wonderful tales of chasing magnificent elk and those ever so sneaky blacktail deer…but I was consigned to darkness for most of my life.  Every time he would open the box I would shout “Take me, take me” but it was not to be.

Years went by and then one night, oh that glorious night,  Bob opened the box and said, “Little Woodie we are going to New Zealand but first you and your brothers need to undergo the ritual of “circumcisionpoint”.  Over a good glass of Merlot, and the idiot jig my little pointy thingy went away.  While painful, I know I am a better broadhead because of my operation.


 

So, tomorrow we start with New Zealand and Too Short's "love" interest...such perversion you never did see.
Beware of all enterprises that require a new suit.

Don't give up what you want most for what you want now.

Offline kawika b

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Re: Terry Green's "Little Woodie" & Too Short
« Reply #1 on: October 21, 2007, 05:22:00 PM »
:thumbsup:  Thanks for sharing your history.
Nana ka maka;
ho`olohe ka pepeiao;
pa`a ka waha.

Observe with the eyes;
listen with the ears;
shut the mouth.

Thus one learns>>>------>TGMM Family of the Bow

Offline John Nail

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Re: Terry Green's "Little Woodie" & Too Short
« Reply #2 on: October 21, 2007, 06:28:00 PM »
It might be "little woodie" but it sure looks like it's screwed on a fiberglass shaft! I have a few of those left also.
Is it too late to be what I could have been?

Offline drewsbow

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Re: Terry Green's "Little Woodie" & Too Short
« Reply #3 on: October 21, 2007, 07:29:00 PM »
Now this is going to be good :0)
Try to be the person your dog thinks you are :0)
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Offline Terry Green

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Re: Terry Green's "Little Woodie" & Too Short
« Reply #4 on: October 21, 2007, 07:33:00 PM »
Too Funny!!!!

The white slashes means there's a 'short' adapter in it!!!...No kiddin!!!    :biglaugh:
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Offline mcgroundstalker

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Re: Terry Green's "Little Woodie" & Too Short
« Reply #5 on: October 21, 2007, 08:06:00 PM »
Wow! Such a heart warming story. The nerve of some people keeping a woodie locked up in a box for so long! ...  

... mike ...   :rolleyes:   ...
"Be faithful in small things because it is in them that your strength lies"

Offline Gil

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Re: Terry Green's "Little Woodie" & Too Short
« Reply #6 on: October 22, 2007, 03:16:00 AM »
Go get um!!
Gil
There's plenty of room for all of God's creatures.Right next to the mashed potatoes.

One can pay back the loan of gold, but one dies forever in debt to those who are kind."

COMPTON TRADITIONAL BOWHUNTERS

Offline [email protected]

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Re: Terry Green's "Little Woodie" & Too Short
« Reply #7 on: October 23, 2007, 02:18:00 PM »
(Little Woodie Notes…Bob has always wanted to go to New Zealand, so he went.  He just needed to go after some not fun life changing events.  

The plan was the “no plan plan”.  Just open yourself to what ever comes your direction  Kinda crazy and not everyone thinks that way or is comfortable in such a hap hazard approach.  After some research on the internet, he decided on the South Island, bought the ticket and let the winds do as they will.)

New Zealand.

Little Woodie here behind the keyboard.  I was cramed into a suitcase with the expendable bow and the strangest “arrows” I ever did see.  Had little curley cue eye type things on them and were awfully short.  Later I found out that these made up into a fly rod and I grew to hate them.

We landed in Christchurch and knocked around the city for several days, trying to get a feel for the Kiwis, the country and driving on the wrong side of the road.  Bob went fly fishing and then decided to explore the island.

He knew that Too Short may be in NZ and decided to give him a call.  Paul and Bob had never met and other than some emails about Helle knives they didn’t know each other.  Low and behold Paul answered the phone and they were only about 3 hours apart!  Karen, Paul’s wife, extended a dinner invitation to Bob that very night…what a classy lady…what she is doing with Too Short?  The Kiwis love her so much they named a lake after her.  She opened her home and heart to Bob.
 

But all this was just the calm before the storm and Pauls Dark Side came out.  He made the local paper.
Thursday, May 17, 2007

Christchurch
New Zealand
South Island

Byline by Kiwi Canthit

News Flash !!

Traditional “icon” Paul B Brunner, aka, Too Short, Too F. Short was caught, on film “rescuing sheep” on an unnamed river near Christchurch last month.  This reporter’s secret, but highly reliable, confidential and impeccable source ( Little Woodie, owned by Bob McMahan, formerly of Helle Knives and Trad Gang member #6) related the following story to me after several rounds of ales at my local tavern.  It was only his strong sense of duty that allowed this tale to come out into the public eye. Because of the scandalous nature of these hideous happenings we have had to tone down the language so as to not offend any of our Trad Gang community.

“I was scouting out this new area looking for game, when off in the distance I heard this terrible commotion of screaming sheep and a high pitched yell.  I couldn’t be sure but it sounded something like “Git along little doggie” with a decidedly cowboy accent.  After positioning myself where I could get a good look, I rubbed my eyes not once, but twice.  Coming across the paddock were a dozen or so sheep on a dead run as if the demons of hell were hot on their hoofs…and pulling up the rear (a’hem) was this very short guy in a funny hat.  The photo of this six inch brown trout shows how tall this little fellow really is.
 


This guy ran the poor sheep into the river and jumped in after them and drove them to the far steep bank.
 

He grabbed a young one and “helped” her climb the slippery bank.  When asked what he was doing, Too Short mumbled something about this is the way we do it in Montana but there we use hip boots.”

 

This reporter rounded up some of his mates and rousted the scoundrel out of town on a rail!

Report by:
Kiwi Canthit.

Unfortunately the fishing was so good that I didn’t get out of the bow case very much.  We did see lots of these…but that’s not what I came for...high fence.

 

Bob said that "sight fishing" big browns had all the elements of spot and stalk hunting.

 

One exploratory hunting trip found us stuck while attemting to ford a river.

 

Too Short finally got out of jail and went fishing again.

 

Bob's Notes:  Paul and Karen are just stand up folks!  They didn't know me from Adam, but showed me around, helped me out, took me fishing and out for dinner.  Just great folks ! !.

I am planning another trip to NZ and am looking for a traveling friend.  We need at least 4 weeks and 6 is a lot better.  Probably Feb and part of March.

Next Woodie adventure...Eastern Oregon and a 7 x 6 elk.
Beware of all enterprises that require a new suit.

Don't give up what you want most for what you want now.

Offline 8th Dwarf

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Re: Terry Green's "Little Woodie" & Too Short
« Reply #8 on: October 23, 2007, 04:03:00 PM »
Baa-aa-aaa-aaaa-aaaaa!

Too Short!
Too Short  or Too F. Short

Offline 8th Dwarf

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Re: Terry Green's "Little Woodie" & Too Short
« Reply #9 on: October 23, 2007, 04:09:00 PM »
Boo-ooo-ooo-oob...I think I can fix you up with a traveling companion.  One of those ladies I found was REALLY cute and she is now "unattached", or so I have heard!

Rache ist ein gericht das du kalt essen must!  If any of you speak/read German, you can tell Bob what this means!

Byyy-byyy-byyy-byy!

Too Short
Too Short  or Too F. Short

Online joe vt

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Re: Terry Green's "Little Woodie" & Too Short
« Reply #10 on: October 23, 2007, 04:10:00 PM »
good gawd that's a awesome brown!!! my favorite trout to catch....
~ joe vt  >>>~~~~~~~~>

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Offline Jeremy

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Re: Terry Green's "Little Woodie" & Too Short
« Reply #11 on: October 23, 2007, 07:10:00 PM »
Quote
The photo of this six inch brown trout shows how tall this little fellow really is.
 
 
I haven't met either of you, just followed your adventures here on TG, but I really have to thank you for that one!!  That was the best laugh I had all week!!  :biglaugh:
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Offline 8th Dwarf

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Re: Terry Green's "Little Woodie" & Too Short
« Reply #12 on: October 23, 2007, 10:31:00 PM »
He meant POUNDS, not inches!  That was, indeed, a six pounder.  Only a flawlessly presented # 16, hand tied by a short fly tier, would take a trout like that.

If Bob hadn't been with me, I would have lifted the fly off the water when I saw the fish coming.  I normally don't bother with them unless they are over 10 pounds.

I'll be baa-aaa-aaa-aaa-aaa-ack!

Too Short
Too Short  or Too F. Short

Offline bohuntr

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Re: Terry Green's "Little Woodie" & Too Short
« Reply #13 on: October 24, 2007, 11:24:00 AM »
Waay too funny!!!!  :biglaugh:
To me, the ultimate challenge in bowhunting is not how far away you can succesfully make a killing shot but rather how close you can get to the animal before shooting.

Offline [email protected]

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Re: Terry Green's "Little Woodie" & Too Short
« Reply #14 on: October 27, 2007, 12:28:00 AM »
Little Woodie here and we are getting ready for elk season! He is hiking most every day with a pack and shooting broadheads.

Bob and friends (thanks Keenan!) made up a running target and it’s a great training aid for moving shots.  

 


They had so much fun they took it to the Western States Rendezvous where it was a big hit…40 +- arrows on one pull and two flats!


 

A new spot and a new hunting partner this year so we don’t really know what to expect.  In our travels we found a few of these.

 

 


About the third day, Stan took this nice bull.  It’s a whole lot steeper than the photo shows!  That Coleman Northstar lantern sure works great and makes for better tracking at night.

 
 
Great shot placement and this bull really dug a furrow when he crashed.

 


Then he got up and stumbled another couple of feet, just enough to go over the edge and then straight down for a good 70 yards.  So, instead of a drive up and load him in the truck, it was a short pack and grunt.   Cleaning and quartering chores done as soon as possible really pays off in quality meat, so if you shoot one right before dark be prepared! Experience has shown that even if it is below freezing, hang and quarter that bull right away; leaving them lay over night does not work.

Early morning has it’s own rewards.
 


As does moon rise at sunset.  The reddish haze is from all the fires in the area.
 
Beware of all enterprises that require a new suit.

Don't give up what you want most for what you want now.

Offline [email protected]

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Re: Terry Green's "Little Woodie" & Too Short
« Reply #15 on: October 27, 2007, 12:43:00 AM »
Early one morning my chance finally came.  From a treestand we saw a smallish 7 x 6 bull come into the clearing and as Bob drew me back the bull skittered away about 5 yards and was on full alert.  What the heck was that all about?  

He settled down and Bob drew me back again only to have the bull blow out of there in a dust cloud.  Did I ever tell you how really stoooooopid Bob can be… back at camp he ripped off the Velcro arrow rest and replaced it with a scrap of leather.  Lesson learned, what an idiot!

We did get a trail cam photo of part of the bull.

 


This impressive hunter can teach us all a thing or two.

 

Two weeks here and little to show for our efforts. Time to meet Bob’s brother in Colorado for their annual get together and elk hunt.

Tomorrow…my demise on a cold and windy Colorado hillside.
Beware of all enterprises that require a new suit.

Don't give up what you want most for what you want now.

Offline 702plmo

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Re: Terry Green's "Little Woodie" & Too Short
« Reply #16 on: October 27, 2007, 12:44:00 AM »
very very neat story.  You sure do have a vivid imagination.
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Offline Falk

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Re: Terry Green's "Little Woodie" & Too Short
« Reply #17 on: October 27, 2007, 07:06:00 AM »
Thank you VERY much Little Woodie! You saved my day - and it was badly needed!   :notworthy:    :D  
Please go ahead and let me and others follow your adventures!

BTW, I would certainly be able to explain what the Short Guy had to say, hidden in German somewhere up the text - if anybody really needs to know ...

Offline Huntrdfk

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Re: Terry Green's "Little Woodie" & Too Short
« Reply #18 on: October 27, 2007, 07:58:00 AM »
Falk, I'd be afraid to ask.......great story Little Woodie, keep looking forward to more.......careful about what you call your keeper though, you may end up back in the dark deep recesses of that tackle box again!  :D    :scared:  

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Offline Tom Leemans

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Re: Terry Green's "Little Woodie" & Too Short
« Reply #19 on: October 27, 2007, 08:12:00 AM »
Now that's entertainment right there. I don't care who ya are.
Got wood? - Tom

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