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Author Topic: Family member suicide  (Read 2875 times)

Offline BillW

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Family member suicide
« on: June 30, 2006, 11:35:00 AM »
Today as I was arriving to work, my mother called and told me that her brother Jerry Bauer (65 yrs old) shot himself. I was numb, as a kid we were all very close. His children from his first marriage grew up with me. When I was about ten years old he and his wife got a divorce (she was unfaithful). It changed our family and after that we saw less of my uncle and his kids. My uncle soon remarried (rebound) and started another family. I never knew these cousins but I heard things. They were wild kids and wild teenagers. I am hearing now the hell my uncle had living at home. Apparently these hooligan kids even beat him up a few times.

My uncle was a caring, kind man who was very hard working. He did nothing but work hard to support that unappreciative bunch.

Funny thing is I have always felt “our” family is my cousins from his first marriage and not these other kids, I just never knew them. I know the children from his first marriage are heart broken and they are all fine people (I am proud how they grew up coming from a divided family).  Our whole family, my mother, her siblings and all the nieces and nephews are all hurting bad now.

The sadness in me is finally coming out but I am at work so I must hold it in. I have talked to my mother and my dad. My mom is so sad and crying, that is hard for me to hear. It is breaking my heart right now to also know that they are preparing to tell my sweet 93 year old grandmother who lives next door that her son is dead. I am so worried what this will do to her.

I have not prayed yet, I will after I type this. I don’t know how to feel (besides sad), should I be mad at my uncle or pity his life. Of course I will forgive him because I loved him, I know he would never hurt us if he realized. I am guessing something happened to push him over the edge. I am not excusing what he did but I certainly cannot condemn him. The last time I saw him we hugged and said “Love you man.” That was about 3 years ago.

Please pray that god forgive my uncle and pray my family has the strength to endure this tragedy.

Regards,
Bill Wright
Aim Small

Offline Aaron Proffitt

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Re: Family member suicide
« Reply #1 on: June 30, 2006, 12:29:00 PM »
Oh, Bill. So sorry for the loss of your Uncle Jerry. Prayers sent from OK.
"First thing we do,let's kill all the lawyers".
Shakespeare Henry VI, Part 2

Does an agnostic,dyslexic,insomniac lie awake at night wondering if there really is a Dog ?

Offline Doc Nock

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Re: Family member suicide
« Reply #2 on: July 01, 2006, 02:50:00 PM »
So many questions that only God, and in His time, can/will be answered--regarding your uncle's situation and how you should feel.

give it to God. As one of our brothers wrote to me a few weeks back and I pass on:

Quote: Matt 6:32-34


34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

And my friend's follow up advice to that scripture:

Allow yourself to be weak, God’s power is perfected in our weakness.  Our circumstances’ are but a finite moment in time.  He has already taken care of the situation… give His ultimate purpose time to unfold.  He that waits upon the Lord…..

I pray for peace on your Uncle's soul and pray for strength for your family, your mom and Grandmom.
The words "Child" and "terminal illness" should never share the same sentence! Those who care-do, others question!

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Offline Benha

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Re: Family member suicide
« Reply #3 on: July 01, 2006, 07:25:00 PM »
I am so sorry for your loss. That's all I know to say.

Offline BillW

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Re: Family member suicide
« Reply #4 on: July 06, 2006, 10:55:00 AM »
Thanks guys! The wake is today and the funeral tomorrow. It has been hard waiting for closure on this. I guess with the holiday and all it has just taken longer. Next two days will be very sad.
Bill
Aim Small

Offline Firstarrow

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Re: Family member suicide
« Reply #5 on: July 06, 2006, 11:15:00 AM »
Sorry Bill for your loss. Prayers for you and yours.
Being first, making a mark and being part of
something great!
Rich

May you keep the wind to your nose, have the patience of Job, and have your Firstarrow fly true.

Offline TexMex

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Re: Family member suicide
« Reply #6 on: July 06, 2006, 04:07:00 PM »
Sorry to hear this Bill,
You say you have not prayed yet but the truth is you just did.


God Bless
May he give you and your family strength.

Offline 4runr

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Re: Family member suicide
« Reply #7 on: July 06, 2006, 04:38:00 PM »
God bless you Brother. We are all here for you and with you.
Kenny

Christ died to save me, this I read
and in my heart I find a need
of Him to be my Savior
          By Aaron Shuste

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Online Bob T.

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Re: Family member suicide
« Reply #8 on: July 06, 2006, 06:22:00 PM »
Bill,sorry for your family's loss. Prayers are sent for you & your family.
BobT.

Offline AnointedArcher

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Re: Family member suicide
« Reply #9 on: July 07, 2006, 07:59:00 AM »
God bless and keep you and your family close in this time of need!
John 8:36
So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.

Offline bayoulongbowman

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Re: Family member suicide
« Reply #10 on: July 15, 2006, 01:02:00 PM »
Bill, I pray for you and family members , may they have peace...Marco#78
"If you're living your life as if there is no GOD, you had  better be right!"

Offline bear1336

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Re: Family member suicide
« Reply #11 on: July 17, 2006, 06:44:00 AM »
Prayers from Georgia.

In HIS service
Dave
Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside thoroughly used up, totally worn out, with bible in hand and loudly proclaim...WOW...What a Ride!!!

Offline ber643

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Re: Family member suicide
« Reply #12 on: July 17, 2006, 07:10:00 AM »
God be with you all in your sorrow. I hate suicides it is such a final solution and yet leaves all the loved ones with no solutions. I pray that your Uncle is at least, and at last, at peace somehow.
Bernie: "Hunters Are People Too"

Ret'd USMC '53-'72

Traditional Bow Shooters of West Virginia (Previously the Official Dinosaur Wrangler, Supporter, and Lifetime Honorary Member)
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Offline DMaster

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Re: Family member suicide
« Reply #13 on: July 17, 2006, 07:39:00 AM »
When one hurts we all hurt,
Father I pray that the family will seek you in this hour of need, that the hurt, grief and pain they feel will subside and they will see your good in all of this. Continue to bless them in this their hour of need, in Jesus we pray, Amen.

In God's Love and Service, peace.
TRINITY ARCHERY FIELD STAFF
-=}|D} }|\\//|{ASTER=>

Offline Shell

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Re: Family member suicide
« Reply #14 on: July 21, 2006, 08:08:00 AM »
Bill, We hope you and your family are doing better, that God is filling youir hearts with comfort. Shell&Frank

Offline Killdeer

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Re: Family member suicide
« Reply #15 on: July 22, 2006, 06:10:00 AM »
I have personal experience dealing with this kind of sorrow, and can tell you that your feelings will evolve, change as time passes and the various facets are considered. My heart goes out to you and your family as you continue to deal with the impact that such a desperate choice leaves on the ones left behind. My prayers for you all, and for your dear uncle. May God hold him close.

Killdeer
Long, long afterward, in an oak I found the arrow, still unbroke;
And the song, from beginning to end, I found again in the heart of a friend.

~Longfellow

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