These are emotional times, friends. As others have faced their demons when confronted by such challenges, I too, am often weak and filled with fear.
I read your words...and tears well up. I'm reminded of many before me who confess that they're not worthy of such comments of praise...
Too often I stumble, and fail to live by Faith. But as Thomas Merton said in a prayer, below, I do believe that by trying...it pleases God.
Nothing I do will ever come to fruition but through Him. My recurring fears are that I somehow get caught in trying to solve my problems and end up not hearing Gods still small voice of guidance, and end up on the wrong path trying to use my own knowledge and skills to resolve problems.
throughout this week, there have been "mini-blessings" showing me as my time here ends, how it may be renewing to be out of a situation where the leadership wants things to change, but doesn't want to have to change... I've run the good race and I'm tired. And while old, too young to "re-tire" so "Lord, show me Your Will and give me strength!"
Thanks folks! Here's this prayer I've been referencing daily lately... and I shared it on C2's thread as well.
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My Lord God
My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going.
I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it
will end.
Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think I am following
your will does not mean that I am actually doing so.
But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you,
and I hope that I have that desire in all that I am doing.
I hope that I never do anything apart from that desire.
And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road though
I may know nothing about it.
Therefore I will trust you always.
Though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death I will not
fear, for you are ever with me and you will never leave me to face my
peril alone.
Thomas Merton,
1915-1968