Uphill battle

[motormouth]

For those of you that know or have read my other posts, you will know o my battle with the whiskey drink. Being so young, it's tough for people to truely understand that this has been a problem for a long time. I am doing alot better but now there are some problems occurring due to this addiction. Minor health stuff, nothing real serious but they can become serious. Prayers are always welcome. They say it gets easier, that's a lie. I'm sure over time it will but it's hard to see right now. Hope you all are well.
-Motormouth

[Doc Nock]

MnM...

It does get easier... any habit, gets easier just as taking a drink got easier and easier to do, so does NOT taking one...

But you didn't end up being a problem drinker overnight and in the terms you posted, "been a long time problem"...then it might just take a reasonably parallel time to break that pattern/habit!

Cowboy up, bucko! You got the mind set to be able to set to doing anything you want... you've got the disposition to put your nose to the trail and stick to anything you want.

now use it!

If trad archery was easy, everyone would do it.
If Christianity was easy, everyone would believe in it and live by it.
If being the son of a preacher were easy, ...well, you get the picture

Choices my man...choices!

We choose our vices.  We choose our options.  We choose the level of discomfort, challenge, difficulties we're willing to fight, face and endure to achieve our goals.

God gave you a wake up call with the "minor" health issues, whatever they may be.  

He loves you! We love you! Your family loves you!

But we can't "do it for you!"

You're not alone, but the battle is yours to fight. God will strengthen you according to the reliance you put on Him and the surrender you give him to die to your own desires and warm feelings from the buzz...

Nobody wants to see you go down this road and you're not on it alone, but you do have to do the fighting one minute, one hour, one day at a time!

Long time problems don't have quick fixes! Wanting to give up the vices of life can be something we "want to want" but there are truths we must face about how much we TRULY want it to be over...or just "manageable".

Alcoholoism is like pregnancy...you're never a "little bit pregnant" and you're never "kinda an alcoholic"

Either you're dependent or you're not. Facing and accepting is a big issue. Once you declare your situation, then you have fewer options to side slip.

Sorry to go on, Pup.    But you hide for a while and then come back so figure I'd better dump all I got to say while you're in a reading mood!

Luv ya, bud... God and a helping hand are both at the end of your arm! Reach and ask!

Old Fart Doc Nock

[shick]

'Mouth, I'm pulling for you.  Listen to Doc Nock, he has a lot of wisdom to offer.  Good words, Doc.
Shick

[Rookie@51]

Addiction is addiction no matter what it is. It can become the most important thing in your life. God can and will break any thing you ask Him to as long as you do it with a repentant heart. The devil on the other hand will like nothing better then to see you return to it and is quick to point out how big a failure you are when you do. Stand fast and be strong and watch what the Lord will do for you.......Dusty

[BenBow]

Praying for God's strength and healing for spirit, soul, and body

[stringstretcher]

Just celibrated 8 years sobriety this past October 1st.  Trust me, it does get easier and better, but it will never go away.  One day at a time makes a week, then a month, the years.  You can do it, all you have to is want to.  Hang in there, it does get better and it's rewards are far greater than its faults.

[Winterhawk1960]

This coming January 7th I will celebrate 22 years of sobriety. It hasn't been an easy journey, nor has it been one that I could have done alone. Doc has given some excellent advice and is worth re-reading, even for someone with as much time as I have under my belt.

All we have is the here and now, I left nothing in that part of my history that I need to go back and try to find. The good Lord has gotten me through some really tough times, just he and I. You see.........I have NO willpower, without HIM........I would still be numbing myself with substances that will fix NOTHING in my life.

I'm not gonna say that it gets "easier".......but it gets "different". That "different" type of dealing with things that make up our individual lives has now became my "normal".........if that makes any sense. Just ask.........and YOU shall receive, but EASY it is NOT. Even today, I am but one drink or drug away from being in the same pair of shoes that I was two decades ago. I thank the good Lord each and every night for my life, my sobriety, my freedom and everything that he has blessed me with. Again, without HIM......my life is nothing.

God Bless YOU..........and I will keep you in my prayers. Anytime that you would like to talk, just PM me your phone number and I would gladly share my "journey" with you.

Winterhawk1960

[DannyBows]

Prayers for you Brother. Stay strong and listen to Doc's words of wisdom.

[Berube]

Prayers sent !

[Doc Nock]

Pup,

You see all the love and hope here from them what been there?

You want it easy? NOpe. You want it fixed? Ready to give it up and not just want to manage it like your buddies might?

I've communicated 1:1 with Don (Winterhawk) and that man don't play. Take his offer, Matt, call him... you didn't earn that nickname "motor mouth" for no reason...talk this out!

I still don't know if your family knows and I danged sure won't be the one to stool on ya, but if you're not talking this out daily... learning, churning, burning... you're making it harder!  PM Don your # and talk with someone who's been there, bubba!

Luv ya man... but you gotta get on this bronc and RIDE sucker RIDE! Bucked off? Get back up and go again... I'll send ya a bag of quarters to keep riding the bull if'n you need.

[motormouth]

so i wont sugar coat it with a cute story or anything, last night i had a bad relapse. drank about half a bottle of Jack D's to myself. had a really bad day and thought i could handle one drink. i couldn't. prayers are always welcome.

[Doc Nock]

Originally posted by Doc Nock:
Pup,

You see all the love and hope here from them what been there?

You want it easy? NOpe. You want it fixed? Ready to give it up and not just want to manage it like your buddies might?

I've communicated 1:1 with Don (Winterhawk) and that man don't play. Take his offer, Matt, call him... you didn't earn that nickname "motor mouth" for no reason...talk this out!

I still don't know if your family knows and I danged sure won't be the one to stool on ya, but if you're not talking this out daily... learning, churning, burning... you're making it harder!  PM Don your # and talk with someone who's been there, bubba!

Luv ya man... but you gotta get on this bronc and RIDE sucker RIDE! Bucked off? Get back up and go again... I'll send ya a bag of quarters to keep riding the bull if'n you need.

"I thought I could handle one drink, but I couldn't"...

Yup. Your learning, Pup!     Reason God gave us arms and legs is so when we fall off whatever "wagon" we're on in life's hurdle-filled existence, we can roll over (might say a few while on your knees on your own behalf, btw) and then stand up, run along side the "wagon" and pull yourself back up on it!

No time for "woe is me" crap either, Bub...

Go "NIKE" and "just do it!"

You PM Charlie (Stringstretcher) or Don (Winterhawk) yet?

Get serious about recovery means leaving NO stone unturned.

Forget the hero crap of "doing it yourself". You didn't get here alone and while only YOU and GOD can fix this...His angels abound to reach out and lift you up!

Do it! Do it NOW!

[Winterhawk1960]

Originally posted by motormouth:
so i wont sugar coat it with a cute story or anything, last night i had a bad relapse. drank about half a bottle of Jack D's to myself. had a really bad day and thought i could handle one drink. i couldn't. prayers are always welcome.

I'm not trying to be a smart-arse.....but I feel the need to ask you a couple of questions.

1. Did the half a bottle of Jack D make the day any better ???

2. Honestly.....did you really think you could just take ONE drink ???

There comes a point where "whatever" our drug of choice is..........IT just doesn't DO it anymore and NO amount will make us unable to still "feel" whatever it was that we were trying to numb ourselves from.

Been there............done that. Got sick and tired of being "sick and tired".

PLEASE reach out to "someone".......    

Thy will be done

Winterhawk1960

[stringstretcher]

So you had a really bad day?  Did that half bottle make it go away?  Or did it let you just forget about it for a while?  Tell me how that half bottle solved your really bad day?

What happens when you have a really really bad day?  Does that get you the whole bottle?  As with any addiction, you have all the answers to take a drink.  Why don't you start asking the questions to yourself that would tell you NOT TOO!!!!

If you want help, you have to want it and not look for excuses in the bottle.  That will just get you to the point that you start all over the next time.

I can assure you, what you did, had no bearing on your really bad day, except for giving you the mind set of this will make it go away.  You are bigger and better than that Matthew.  Or are you?

[BenBow]

The misbelief that things and the way life happens to you makes you happy is part of the root of your problem. You believe in happiness which is based on what happens so your feelings go up and down like a roller coaster. You have to grasp that you and you alone are responsible for your own feelings. Nothing and no one can MAKE you feel anything unless you believe they can. Once you grasp that you are in control of your feelings you can feel great in the midst of any situation. You can feel great without a drink. In fact you can feel better than you ever have with a drink. Once I understood this there wasn't a drug or drink that could get me as high as I choose to feel without them. Try it! Next tough time that comes around, and it will, start praising God for the good things you have and that you don't have to let that tough time rule your life. Laugh to spite the problem and win.
Choose Joy which is based on your own choice and is constant and growing. Happiness jerks you around and makes you a jerk. With joy people will say your smile comes all the way from your toes and that's called deep joy. Find it and you find life.

[Rookie@51]

I just finished reading the book by Josh Hamilaton (not the right spelling) who was the highest paid rookie ever coming out of high school to play baseball. He overcame alot to get back to where he is today. You need to get your hands on this book and read it. You will see that the way he overcame his demons was one day at a time and with Jesus in his heart and mind and soul and ear. You can't and won't get past this without Jesus and without really looking for and facing up to the things that make you drink. You can lie to the man looking back at you every morning when you look into the mirror but you can't lie to God. He knows your heart and mind. You need to give the fellows on here a call and connect with them as they have been there and done that. I have been dry for 25 years and it took me excepting Jesus as my Lord and Savior and giving HIM control. Just remember addiction is addiction no matter what it is and Christ will and can break any addiction we have except being addicted to HIM. I'm praying for you and I know you will beat this. P.U.S.H. Pray until something happens.......Dusty

[Alvey]

lot's of good advise here.prayer sent buddy.

[BenBow]

Amen Rookie@51

[Hooked]

praying for you!

[motormouth]

i have to admit, when i first read your responses, i was mad. but then i realized that you guys have been thru this. I think i was mad at myself really, cause i couldn't answer Winterhawk or string's questions without knowing that i really didnt even need to answer them, that i already knew the answer. No, the half bottle did nothing but hurt me and my situation. i realized now that the reason did it is that it was the norm for me. when i used to have a bad day, thats what i did. its a comfort zone thing. god has really been working in me and helping me seek help. i now see an addictions counsler at least twice a month. sometimes more. For those of you that don't know, my pops is a pastor and dang good one. him and i have been talkng too, which is nice. i dont get to spend alot of time with him. just ask doc, my dad is one of the best. i also ant to thank you guys for the "Tough Love". its tough hehe but needed. God Bless.