Married for one yr, having a hard time dealing with it, what to do

[bigb3303]

So I love my wife, and we have been maried one year october 19th. But she is not an outdoors girl, and I live to be in the woods, and on the water! It is hard for me , becouse every time I want to go on a trip, like the trad gang hog hunts is a big NO. She dosnt understand..... Becouse I have to be in the woods!!! My doctor says its a personality dissorder, but I hate society. I wish I could live  alone, in a cabin some where, totaly self sufficant, and live of the land.

I feel like its in my veins, and its always calling my name! So my time in the woods hunting, keeps me sane! I prob sound crazy but I cant help it. I just need to vent. I dont kn

[BenBow]

Prayers sent for love and communication between you two

[monkeyball]

Brandon,
         You and I have some things in common.
 I love the outdoors also,in all kind of ways,and it has been a big part of my life.

  On October 19 (told you we have some things in common), 16 years ago, I married a beautiful lady that had no idea what she was getting herself into.

 To get to the point,she has become a real good sport with me and "my" interests and has become fond of them.

 Maybe you need to share some of your interests with your wife,introduce her to some of them in a way that is not threatning. You may be surprised.

 And don't forget, it is a give and take,she has interests too. Make it work. I will be praying for you.
              Craig

           

[GRAYBEARD]

Brandon,
Marriage takes work, often lots of it. Both of you need to sit down with open minds and hearts and talk it through. It can't be a one-way deal but there was enough love to bring you together, with some effort I'm sure you can burnish it to luster you can both enjoy.
Best of Luck!
Craig, Any wife that can ride backwards and shoot a bow has to be A#1!!
Regards to you both,
Jed

[Stone Knife]

Genesis 2:18

 The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”

[mcgroundstalker]

Brandon,

Before I got married, hunting and the shooting sports WAS my life... Now, it's still a big part but my wife comes first... All you need to do is share time with your honey doing some of the things she likes... "Earn Your Time Away From Home", is what someone taught me many years ago.

Best of Luck!

[monsterchelli]

[DennyK]

I can relate in my younger days. But what I needed to understand is after marriage the 1st priority after God is your wife, then your work then the rest follows. It took me a long time to reailze that. The good news is we are happy in our faith and our marriage. Our 25th wedding anniversary is next year. I'll be praying for you for wisdom and discernment in your priorities. If you love God-you can't hate people.

[Shane Reed]

I completely understand! Also married in October 27th. Be thankful for the time you get out being married and now add two kids to the mix.

[Keefer]

I agree with Denny K here and many others and Marriage is an oath you made between God and your wife and I know it hurts when the woods call us to come but remember life isn't just about us and what's in it for me...I've been married for 26 years and she knew the woods call my name and we work out a time for me to be in the woods but I also have three adopted girls that tke first priority and at 50 years of age my girls are 7,6,an 2 an they need a daddy more then a deerhunter right now ...I feel quilty when I do hunt and I may only get 5 to 8 sittings in a year and I focus it around the rut so my chances are better...God didn't want us to be self centered and only think of what's in it for me when we marry our lovely wives...Yes I agree a man needs some time in the woods as some women nee time to shop for shoes,cloths or whatever thier passion may be...She want's to be with you an know where you are at every second of every day but that will wear off the longer you are married an she will be happy for you to go but Trust is something that we must earn and let her know she can trust you will always be there..Invite her to go and if not so be it...Do not and I repeat do not let your hunting or hobbies come between you and your wife cause too many people go straight to the courthouse for a quick fix to get devorced before giving a marriage time to grow...When you asked her to mary you it ws for life an a shared bondage between both of you not just for you to do what you wanted to do the rest of your life...If you wanted to be in a cabin alone in a wilderness all alone by yourself you should of gave that heavy thought before saying "I-Do"..That means Forever For Always and No Matter What...
I'll pray that you will really think very hard about what's more important in life...Don't listen to too many country songs about you and just your dog and fishing but listen to song that God sings to your heart instead...
God I ask you work in both this young man and his wifes heart and speak to them both in Jesus name I pray!
              Keefers <><

[bigb3303]

Thank you so much for the advice and prayers guys! It really means a lot!

[Doc Nock]

Just returned and I ache to read your trial.

We are forced to be "educated" for many years to just make a living, but get little by way of guidance in how to choose a mate, make a marriage work or raise children so easily created...

Much good advice above.  When two become one, there is no I left that is an isolated entity!

Many of my friend's wives, were "threatened" by the competition they felt with the draw of Mother Nature.

That is huge.  Helping a young bride become entrenched in KNOWING how much you love her, but in a different way from that time with our Maker in the woods, might help ease the transition.

Including her, like MOnkey said, might not get you a shooting partner like him, but it may also get her to at least understand the awesome beauty and majesty of the outdoor world that lures you.

Don't expect her to hump long trails in bad boots or clothes that do not fit, but allow her to EASE into some aspects of the outdoors... stars at night, watching the woods come awake at dawn... the sights, sounds and smells.

But in all things, marriage like Faith, seems to be a lot about "dying to self" and more about forming a union that is of two, not one!

Good luck. Keep the Son in your eyes!

[Kimber Rowan]

I will say this, I never discouraged Donald from hunting he said many times that he finally felt free, he didn't have to ke his bow buying secret, heck I'm the one who kept bow buying secrets. I understood my husband and I knew when I married him that the woods were in his blood. Maybe encourage your wife to join here and see that this is mostly amazing men of faith with one or 2 common threads, the main one is hunting. Marriage is work and ypu can't put your hobbies before your home....God bless you