I will say, first you are human with a heart, a soul and spirit. That won't change!
I won't tell someone how they Should feel!
It happens in hunting, no matter the weapon or tool we choose to use.
I've hunted squirrels since I was a young boy.
And have taken 100s with gun and bow.
Last year, I shot one with a 22 rifle, that made a noise like nothing I had ever heard a squirrel, make.
Animals have personalities, too.
It's an experience, I believe all hunters will have in the field.
What you do or hunt will be your choice and desire, going foward.
I have known a few people who shot a deer, and would never hunt again.
And that's okay, your still a good person, human being!
Your always welcomed here, for sure!