Hang in there!
I ended up raising my two sons from when they were 11 and 12 years old. It was a tough go for 8 years prior to that, but the best thing that ever happened to me personally.
I'm not saying it was easy street after I rec'd custody and raised them.
Thank God for family and friends. But I'll guarantee you, someone was watching out for the boys and me.
Best experience of my life. Sometimes bad things happen. Keep your chin up and your heart in the right place, because if you do it right, good things will happen and they will tenfold outwiegh the bad.