Author Topic: You might be a Redneck if...... (Read 1536 times)

Cyclic-Rivers · « **Reply #40 on:** March 05, 2011, 09:27:00 AM »

... If your Idea of a home entertainment center is a bird feeder and a dozen cedar arrows.

IE.. Cedar arrows over der son, bring dem to me I gots a skwerl to gets.

trad_bowhunter1965 · « **Reply #41 on:** March 05, 2011, 10:27:00 AM »

Quote

Originally posted by snag:
...you might be a redneck if you consider roadkill legal game. After swerving and hitting a deer on the way to your hunting grounds you stop and load up your kill by putting it in the back seat of your sedan. Driving home with a grin on your face you find he was just knocked out. After he came back to his senses he kicked the poo out of you. You escape with your life but in bad shape. So you call 911 asking for a "bambulance"......

That is to fun snag, had and old trapper tell me one time he had caught a bobcat and he shot it in the head with a 22 and was coming home, and the bobcat woke up with a big knot on it's head it the truck and the trapper jump out the truck wile driving down the road.

adeeden · « **Reply #42 on:** March 05, 2011, 10:45:00 AM »

my ten year old just said a good one. i have been at the hospital with my sick wife for the last three days. my little ones here with me this morning. he was looking out the window (were on the fourth floor) and he says dad wish i had my bow i have a perfect shot at a squirrel! Excuse my typeing im on my phone.

Mudd · « **Reply #43 on:** March 05, 2011, 11:36:00 AM »

If you have ever asked your wife if she would mind saving some items she normally discards so you can try them to see if estrogen will really attract bucks.

Back in those days no one outside the immediate family could go into the fridges freezer section for anything!!.....lol

God bless,Mudd

PS: I almost disgusted myself....lol

Eugene Slagle · « **Reply #44 on:** March 05, 2011, 11:53:00 AM »

You might be a Redneck if you mow your lawn to make a shooting lane.

Guilty...

KHALVERSON · « **Reply #45 on:** March 05, 2011, 11:54:00 AM »

Quote

Originally posted by USN_Sam1385:
You might be a redneck:

If you have a gun safe in your room.

If you haven't bought any street clothes in 5+ years as you'd rather spend the money on hunting clothes/gear.

If you plan your honeymoon so that you come back from your wedding the day before Spoonbill Snagging season opens.

If you've ever hauled a truck load of composted manure for your garden.

If you think cowboy boots are completely acceptable for every day wear, in every situation.

If your wife gets mad at you for trying to cook your Euro mount on the kitchen stove.

If you decided your kid's tire swing makes a great target for 'stump' shooting.

If opening day of deer season is like your holy day, and you plan all other life events around it.

If your 'church' is in a deer stand somewhere.

You have a 10 step plan for what to do in the event of a world crisis, and you also have enough ammunition.

hey thats me
one more to add
if the weathers crappy you shoot your bow in the garage or the house if its real cold out

SEMO_HUNTER · « **Reply #46 on:** March 05, 2011, 11:55:00 AM »

I coulda went the rest of the morning without that thought Roy.

Keefer · « **Reply #47 on:** March 05, 2011, 11:57:00 AM »

If you use a straw to suck up the Hot bow string wax you just made to put into the containers...Worked for me and I MADE 100 Of those wax cakes....Tongue is still a little numb and people think I have a lisp when I Talk...Hey but I didn't spill any this time...

FubarFred · « **Reply #48 on:** March 05, 2011, 03:15:00 PM »

How 'bout if yer ma-in-law used to ask before she went into the downstairs freezer 'cause of the 'things' (her words) in there.
Fred...

wildgame · « **Reply #49 on:** March 05, 2011, 03:32:00 PM »

if you got married in camo!!lol

John Lipinski · « **Reply #50 on:** March 05, 2011, 03:58:00 PM »

...if you watch nascar.

That is all.

owlbait · « **Reply #51 on:** March 05, 2011, 04:16:00 PM »

...if you wear a skirt while turkey hunting!

SEMO_HUNTER · « **Reply #52 on:** March 05, 2011, 04:27:00 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by wildgame:
if you got married in camo!!lol

Heck Yeah Man!

mongoose · « **Reply #53 on:** March 05, 2011, 05:35:00 PM »

You just might be a redneck if... You come back from elk hunting, haul the elk up on the frong porch because it's rainin and the porch falls and kills more than 3 hounds

bornagainbowhunter · « **Reply #54 on:** March 05, 2011, 06:49:00 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by straitera:
Redneck if;

1. the taxidermist's on speed dial.

2. your wife checks you for ticks

3. wear camo to church

4. know a shortcut to WalMart

5. bowfish w/dynamite.

6. bought your wife's anniversary present in your draw weight

...if you consider #2 foreplay!!

...if one of your friends married his sister. True story, but it was his step sister. I'll give him that.

...if you know what helicopter, helicopter, helicopter means.

...if you feed your horses in the mornings in nuthin' but boots and boxers.

...if you have ever been tought one of those life lessons by a live deer...nearly got beat to death.

God Bless,
Nathan

Two Wolves · « **Reply #55 on:** March 05, 2011, 06:59:00 PM »

Nope, taint no redneks on hear cuz dey kant sifer, spell, tipe or use a puter!

Sixby · « **Reply #56 on:** March 05, 2011, 07:19:00 PM »

Laughing here. I had a next door neighbor and we both lived in a pretty nice subdivision. New one in fact . We called him Earhhardt because he looked just like him and this guy loved to hunt and fish.Problem is he didn't know about seasons or laws and he just went when he wanted to. Lost his hunting liscense finally. But that didn't slow him down. I came home one day and he has this buck hanging on his sons basket ball net right out in front of the house skinning it/ People standing around all over the place. Now we got a bunch of these folks that are liberals from California that moved up here and they flat out don;t like hunting. I always wondered if he drove though town with the buck strapped to the hood of his car.

God bless you all, Steve

7 Lakes · « **Reply #57 on:** March 05, 2011, 07:58:00 PM »

If you stop on the interstate for a road kill fox so you can use the tail for string silencers.

If you are a highway patrolman and take a bribe of half a fox tail to tear up a ticket, you're a redneck. Thanks Bob.

Stickbow · « **Reply #58 on:** March 05, 2011, 11:00:00 PM »

Wow, I am guilty of many of these...........except what Mudd said!

bornagainbowhunter · « **Reply #59 on:** March 07, 2011, 07:25:00 AM »

I am feeling right at home...


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Author Topic: You might be a Redneck if...... (Read 1536 times)

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