The other side of the dad story

[Mudd]

There is a thread on pow wow that speaks of how we need to enjoy and honor our fathers(dads) while they are still around.

Here is another side to the "dad" advice.
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If you are a dad.... be a dad!!!

Even when it's not easy.

I am one to talk... but it is said that confession is good for the soul, so here goes

I was the stay home dad with my daughter. We did everything together. I taught her her how to hunt with any and all of the weapons I owned or could get my hands on.

She is a deer killing machine. I hope she has battled her "blood lust" by now...lol One archery season I helped her drag 7 deer from the woods.

I started her on traditional bows almost as soon as she learned to walk. I've posted up pictures of her in the past with all kinds of game she had taken with her trad bows. Everything from yard birds that I tried my best to get her to stop shooting at...lol to rabbits, squirrels,fish and deer.

I think somewhere along the way I stopped being the dad I should have and became her buddy.

That hasn't worked out so well for me or her(I imagine).

All I'm saying is I should have been a better dad and not tried so hard at the friend thing.

I know most of you are great dads...keep on with what your doing.

If this isn't an acceptable post, please let me know and delete it.

Thank you!

God bless,Mudd

PS: I feel better for the confession.

[GreyGoose]

You may not be a perfect dad, but it sure sounds as if you've done the most important thing a dad can do, which is spend time with your daughter or son, teaching them. And it's never over; you've still got time and opportunity to be the best father you can.  God bless you and hang in there!

[Panzer]

You planted the seed, and thats what counts. My guess is that she is either a teenager or early twenties, if so they can be a handful at that age. Just so you know, she will blame you for all of her problems atleast for a little while.

[SKITCH]

Yeah Mudd...your daughter had a dad that loved to get outdoors, hunt and teach the bow and arrow....spend time with her and be her buddy.

My dad liked Scotch!  Usually with a few pieces of ice and a splash of water.  That's about it.

[Duker]

Mudd    Sounds like you did a FINE job raising your daughter:::Just being there for her is great    Give yourself a pat on the back  

[J. Cook]

Amazing point Mudd!!!!  Parents have to be parents, and let their friends be their friends.  There are 100's of times were you get to be both, but without ever losing site of what has to be the priority!

Very well said Mudd!!!

[akaboomer]

Well said and great advice. You have done far better than many for that be proud.

I tell my wife often we are not raising them to be good kids, we are raising them to be goods adults. We all have our faults, lord knows I have many.  There is no perfect dad or mom. All things being considered from what I know you did well.

Chris

[NO SIGHTS]

As an expecting father of my first, I dont really know how to feel towards this.
But the way you describe how you raised your daughter is EXACTLY the tactic I want to employ.
Be their friend. Is there something horribly wrong with said tactic?
Kinda weird getting parenting advice here but i would listen to you guys before some quack!

[JEFF B]

ya done good bro  

[LONGSTYKES]

Mudd, I think you did well. Both my son and daughter are my friends as well as my children. I am very proud of both of them. They turned out to be great adults as well a very good parents.I am very lucky man.

Don

[GMASIUK]

Mudd, don't be too hard on yourself! I feel the same way myself sometimes. But then I stop and think about it and I realize that kids don't come with an owners manual and instructions!

We as parents just have learn as we go and to do our best. And it sounds like you have.  Peace brother.

[Canyon]

Mudd you are so right. If you are worried if your children like you when they need direction then you are likely I not making the right decision and I beleive not being a real Dad. Sometimes we get lucky and they realize why we are doing what we are and like (love) us for it.

With that said sometimes they will be who they were born to be and never see things our way. If you did your best with a good heart then that is all anyone can ask of a Dad.

[ripforce56]

I raised three boys, (LimbLover is my oldest) with all 3 I was always envolved with their activities, sports etc! Now 2 are married, one almost is, they all are college educated (more than me) and doing fairly well!  All 3 are good people with good values! When they were young sometimes I had to make decisions and actions that did not make me and my wife very popular with my kids, thats parenting, and believe me I had plenty of those times along the way!Now that they are older and I have 2 grandkids it great to here them say " Man Dad you were so right about that" only now have we become more like friends but they all come to me and my wife for advice we don't always agree but thats still being a parent! I see too much of this "I am my kids best friend" with younger parents today, for some reason they are worried about not being liked by their kids! Toughest thing in the world is to be a parent and make that tough decision that you know  when make it, you are NOT going to be very well liked! Thats parenting, its the toughest job in the world!

[GRINCH]

My Dad became my friend when I was an adult,while I was growing up he was a parent.He became my friend when I realized how much I had learned from him he was an inspiration for me,and like most parents knew much more than me.I still miss his guidance today.